With my on-going project of 100 Things I Want to Do Before 30, I have compiled a list of the things I'm really proud to say I've already done!
1. Travel outside of the country. In 2008, I went out of the country for the first time. It was crazy to think I'd made it to 25 and not left the country. But then I waited another four years to leave again. I have been to both Mexico and Costa Rica and look forward to many, many more trips out of the country. In fact, I believe we'll be taking one for my 30th birthday.
2. Recognize that the grass always seems greener on the other side, but rarely is. This was a hard lesson to learn, and I still have to remind myself to live my life with this in mind. It's easy to think that you want what someone else has or even what everybody else has, but chances are good, they have complaints and wishes for greener grass as well.
3. Learn how to grocery shop. Not only can I do this, but I can do this like a mother f*cker.
4. Find a career you love. I somehow lucked into the career I have. I never imagined myself being in higher education or outreach, but after my very first professional job in college admissions, I was in love. And the passion has been blazing since.
5. Beware of credit cards. I have heard many a horror story about credit card debt and the pitfalls of it. My family never really used credit cards, so in my mind, it was never really an option. While I may wear my debit card out, I will never scan a credit card.
6. Be in a relationship with a purpose. This may sound silly, but so many of my past romantic relationships were purposeless. They may have felt purposeful, but looking back, my emotional wheels were spinning but not getting me anywhere. I finally feel happy and secure in a relationship that fits me.
7. Start a blog. Done and done.
8. Live on your own. When I was 21 years old, I moved into my first grown-up apartment. I did move back in with my mom for two months in 2008 to get back on my feet after a bad break-up. But I quickly got back up on those feet and lived on my own--all alone--until January 2012 when I moved in with Joel. But that totals 7 years of living on my own, most of those all alone. I have no doubts that I can make it on my own, stand on my own two feet, and be the independent goddess I can be.
9. Dine alone. I know lots of people who have never done this, but I, in the past, made an art of it. I worked in a career where I traveled alone most of the time for several years. In this time, I loved getting dressed up, going to dinner, sitting at the bar and having a drink...all alone. It gives me time to think, a chance to people watch, and honestly, makes me feel ultra glamorous.
10. Pay all my own bills. This goes with the living alone, but I started paying all of my own bills when I was 19 years old. There have been times I've been in some tough spots, and there have been times I've had to ask for help from some wonderful people in my life, and there have been times when I've just had to figure it out. But I have done it and still do and am extremely proud of that.
11. Ask out a crush. I remember when I was single and was interested in someone who wasn't asking me out, most of my friends would tell me to lay low, send subliminal messages, but never ask him out. But then one guy came along that I simply couldn't be coy with. And so I bit the bullet and asked him out. And over a year later, he realizes that was the best thing that could ever happen to him (or at least he freaking better).
12. Quit a job that wasn't right for me. I took a job in my early 20's and although I thought I wanted the job, and I thought it would make me happy, it didn't. It made me miserable. So I made a hard choice and didn't look back. And although it was scary at the time, it worked out for the best.
13. Do something everyone thought I shouldn't. Maybe not everyone, but lots of people thought I shouldn't move home in 2008. I had lived in Lexington for 7 years and had a pretty good life there. But I was yearning for a life in Owensboro. I wasn't close to my family (proximity-wise), and I was missing my nephew and three little brothers grow up. I took a lot of crap for making that decision, but I'm so happy I made it.
14. Move away from home. Again, I lived in Lexington for 7 years, and I'm so happy I was able to experience life outside of Owensboro. It was different and great and gave me memories to last a lifetime.
15. Move back home. Because it was absolutely right for me.
16. Fall in love. I have fallen in love, out of love, and stayed happily in love. It is the best feeling in the whole world and sometimes it can evoke the worst feelings in the whole world, but I am thankful for my experiences in love, and I can't wait to keep building on this certain love story that has my heart.
17. Opened my heart to someone. In my earlier 20's, I thought I wanted a bad boy. I mistook lust for love. I hurt people. I got hurt. I sabotaged perfectly good relationships. I waited around for people who weren't worth it. I let love get away. But through it, I learned that opening your heart doesn't always end in walking away with pieces missing. It can mean something new and wonderful and life-changing. And that's something I can get on board with.
18. Accept the things in my past so I can move forward. Big things have happened in my life that have broken me. Things that I thought I'd never get over or learn to deal with. As I have gotten older, however, I've learned to accept that those things are part of the journey that's leading me in the direction of happiness and wholeness.
19. Forgive someone. With the stories in my life that are full of pain and brokenness, there have been people along the way who hurt me or disappointed me or broke my heart. I have forgiven all of those people. Some of them are still in my life, some of them are no longer, but they are all forgiven in my book.
20. Forgive myself. I've made some pretty terrible decisions in my life. I've done things I'm not proud of. I've allowed myself to be in and stay in bad and even dangerous situations. For a long time, I didn't believe that I could keep myself safe or allow myself to be in healthy relationships. I was angry at myself for that. But in growing up and working through past mistakes, I have learned that I, too, am human and if I can forgive other people, I can forgive myself as well.
Keep checking back for my list 100 Things I Want to Do Before 30 and see how I'm making progress on the list!!
Monday, September 24, 2012
Sunday, September 23, 2012
100 Things Before 30 List: 10 Things I Would Never Add
So I've been working on a blog project I'm really excited about where I'm identifying 100 (okay, it's actually shaping up to be 110) things I am going to do before I'm 30 and try to complete them all before the big day. I have spent the last week compiling my list, and for that, I did some extensive research on the internet of other people's suggestions. With that, I came across a few things I would never add to my list. And because you're dying to know, here they are:
1. Do unacceptable things to your hair. At first, I added this to my list. Then I started thinking about my job, my fear of having bad hair, and my commitment to high fashion (which also sometimes includes not putting on clothes all day or wearing the same yoga pants for an entire week). Suddenly, I panicked and marked it off my list. Maybe had I started my list when I was 22 or 17 or, oh, f*ck it, I would have never done unacceptable things to my hair. (Except for maybe not wash it for four straight days--which I do often.)
2. Savor the hangovers of your 20's. This is not going on the list because I absolutely hate hangovers with a fiery passion. So much so that I will sometimes sacrifice a little extra fun in an effort to avoid hangovers (crazy, I know). I have had more than my fair share of hangovers, and so now I would never again willingly sign up for one. Call me a grandma, that's cool. I'll call you the morning after drinking and sing you a song, since I won't be hungover.
3. Go to Vegas. I don't know why, but this is just not my cup of tea. Lots of people get super pumped about going to Vegas and go often and love it. I have not even an ounce of desire to go. This is what Vegas has to offer: alcohol. I have that at home. Big boobs: I don't have them myself and do not care to see them. Gambling: No, thank you. I prefer to, instead of taking $200 and trying to turn it into $400, take $200 and try to turn it into three or four new outfits for me! Sorry, Vegas, you didn't make the cut.
4. Run a marathon. Simple, I'd like to actually complete the things on the list.
5. Buy a house. Lots of people recommended adding this to your pre-30 brag points. This will not be going on my list because we already have a place to live. In fact, we have three.
6. Get purposefully sunburned. Recently on our trip to Orlando, I covered my powder white skin in SPF 100. Not only is getting sunburned uncomfortable and painful, but it is dangerous. I have been through the phases of laying out with baby oil on, going to the tanning bed daily, and dealing with the inevitable result of sun poisoning. I'll keep my milky-whiteness and my skin cancer-free body.
7. Own a convertible. Have you seen my hair after getting out of a convertible? Two words: rat's nest. Will never happen.
8. Bungee jump. Everyone says to add this to my list. I say they are crazy cakes.
9. Do something ridiculous like quit my job just to say I did it. Part of being in your late 20's is realizing how to be responsible when you need to be. I don't want to add anything to this list that would jeopardize the things I've worked hard to build. I'll be keeping my home, job, SO, and all other important things throughout this process.
10. Move away to live somewhere else. I have lived in another city in my lifetime, and it was an amazing experience that I will always cherish. But now, Owensboro is the place for me. It fits my lifestyle, and my job and loved ones are here. I will continue to travel, but I'm fairly sure that my roots will continue to spread in the good 'ole city of Owensboro, KY.
Keep checking back to see the 20 Things I'm Proud I Did in My 20's, the 100 Things I Want to Do Before 30, and the results as I work through the list!
1. Do unacceptable things to your hair. At first, I added this to my list. Then I started thinking about my job, my fear of having bad hair, and my commitment to high fashion (which also sometimes includes not putting on clothes all day or wearing the same yoga pants for an entire week). Suddenly, I panicked and marked it off my list. Maybe had I started my list when I was 22 or 17 or, oh, f*ck it, I would have never done unacceptable things to my hair. (Except for maybe not wash it for four straight days--which I do often.)
2. Savor the hangovers of your 20's. This is not going on the list because I absolutely hate hangovers with a fiery passion. So much so that I will sometimes sacrifice a little extra fun in an effort to avoid hangovers (crazy, I know). I have had more than my fair share of hangovers, and so now I would never again willingly sign up for one. Call me a grandma, that's cool. I'll call you the morning after drinking and sing you a song, since I won't be hungover.
3. Go to Vegas. I don't know why, but this is just not my cup of tea. Lots of people get super pumped about going to Vegas and go often and love it. I have not even an ounce of desire to go. This is what Vegas has to offer: alcohol. I have that at home. Big boobs: I don't have them myself and do not care to see them. Gambling: No, thank you. I prefer to, instead of taking $200 and trying to turn it into $400, take $200 and try to turn it into three or four new outfits for me! Sorry, Vegas, you didn't make the cut.
4. Run a marathon. Simple, I'd like to actually complete the things on the list.
5. Buy a house. Lots of people recommended adding this to your pre-30 brag points. This will not be going on my list because we already have a place to live. In fact, we have three.
6. Get purposefully sunburned. Recently on our trip to Orlando, I covered my powder white skin in SPF 100. Not only is getting sunburned uncomfortable and painful, but it is dangerous. I have been through the phases of laying out with baby oil on, going to the tanning bed daily, and dealing with the inevitable result of sun poisoning. I'll keep my milky-whiteness and my skin cancer-free body.
7. Own a convertible. Have you seen my hair after getting out of a convertible? Two words: rat's nest. Will never happen.
8. Bungee jump. Everyone says to add this to my list. I say they are crazy cakes.
9. Do something ridiculous like quit my job just to say I did it. Part of being in your late 20's is realizing how to be responsible when you need to be. I don't want to add anything to this list that would jeopardize the things I've worked hard to build. I'll be keeping my home, job, SO, and all other important things throughout this process.
10. Move away to live somewhere else. I have lived in another city in my lifetime, and it was an amazing experience that I will always cherish. But now, Owensboro is the place for me. It fits my lifestyle, and my job and loved ones are here. I will continue to travel, but I'm fairly sure that my roots will continue to spread in the good 'ole city of Owensboro, KY.
Keep checking back to see the 20 Things I'm Proud I Did in My 20's, the 100 Things I Want to Do Before 30, and the results as I work through the list!
Friday, September 21, 2012
Flashback Friday
Because I have been posting vacation memories this week from last week, you loyal readers have no idea what I've been doing this week. (And I know it's keeping you up at night.) Frankly, I'm so busy that I don't even know what I've been doing this week, but I'm going to try to recall some of the highlights.
I have a wine-induced injury. Not even lying. You know I went to the wine festival on Saturday night and bought several bottles of wine. Well, I purchased a few too many to fit in my handy-dandy wine-carrier that one of the booths gave me, so I was using my purse as a make-shift wine carrier. At one point in the night, I bent over to pick something up and a bottle of wine came rocketing out of my purse and jammed into my elbow. Which luckily broke the fall to the ground, so the wine was salvaged. My elbow was not. I was convinced it was broken for two full days. Joel says broken and "has a bruise" aren't the same. Whatever, it's totally broken. Or chipped. Or something.
I had a cancellation at work on Tuesday, and I actually got to take a nap. It was the best day of my life. Joel was kind enough to recommend I take a nap every day this week, but I told him if I did, we'd have to go to work naked and hungry every day.
I caught up with great friends this week! On Monday, my life-long friend Connie Beth (who just moved back to Owensboro) and my hair expert/very good friend Leslie, and I all went to have drinks and appetizers at a great place called Niko's. It was so much, and I absolutely love getting my friends who don't know each other together, because then we can all be friends! Speaking of, I got to see my very good friend, Brandi and my very good friend/coworker Shelley on Wednesday, and we had lunch at the Bistro with my other very good friend who just moved back to Owensboro, Ashley. I haven't laughed as hard as I did at that lunch in a very long time. In my dream life, I could have lunches like that every day.
I got to see DEE!!! Girls and boys, my sweet preg has been so busy lately because she has welcomed a German exchange student into her home and she has a one year old and our jobs are crazy cakes. But we both had a sliver of time today to grab lunch and tell each other how much we love each other. It made my whole week!! (And I totally think she should start blogging about having a GES, and we should all read it!!! Hint, hint, Dee!!)
We may have a new addition to our family. And when I say "may," I mean most certainly. Remember when Em moved away and my soft-hearted SO agreed to keep her stray kitty at the farm?
Well, I will be completely honest with you for a moment. After she dropped the cat off, we never saw it again. We had resigned ourselves to the fact that it had been eaten by a coyote or something equally as tragic. I poured a bit of wine out for my fallen homie and moved on. But a few nights ago, we saw something stirring in the bushes, and I will be damned if it wasn't that cat. Joel got it food and water, and I convinced myself that I could touch and hold this kitty who hates people. Joel kept telling me this would never happen, but after about 45 minutes, she came into my arms and started calling me her mommy. We held her a bit while Joel made bets with his friends about whether or not I would bring this cat home to live with us. I kept telling him no amount of love justifies a litter box and that this thing could brave the storm at the farm (I mean she already did for almost two months). But within the hour, he had convinced me to bring this thing home. Now we sort of love her. All of us but CD. He's pissed. And she hates him. And they are in constant competition for eating each other's food. So I've played referee all afternoon between these two, but currently we're at peace, so here's hoping. Here's also hoping this sweet kitty learns to use the litter box and that Joel learns to clean it.
Our sweet kitty turned into an attack kitty. So, we were calling the cat Essie. Because originally we named her Shack Cat, but I said I wasn't going to go around calling for "Shack Cat," so we abbreviated to SC. If you say that fast, it's Essie. However, once our sweet little love started coming around and getting super used to her new family, we spotted a flea on her and decided to spray her with a touch of kitty flea spray. Now, her name is Katniss Everdeen because that bitch is a fighter. She scratched us and bit us and otherwise kicked the asses of two humans, despite the fact that she can't weigh more than two pounds. So we have been nursing our wounds today. I am convinced that I have cat scratch fever and that my finger is going to fall off, but both Joel and Grannie Annie keep assuring me that's not the case. Joel's hands look like a tiny vampire tried to eat them from all the fang marks and my finger is hanging half off (no exaggeration. Okay, maybe a little exaggeration.) I'd include pictures but I'm afraid if I keep typing and playing on the computer, the shred of skin that's holding on my middle finger will break and I'll bleed to death. Katniss Everdeen went to the vet today, and she's a healthy little bugger, but we will have to keep an eye on her to make sure she--and we--don't have rabies.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go nurse my wounds and hope that Katniss Everdeen doesn't start foaming at the mouth or go into attack kitty mode again. Wonder what a good dose of wine does to kittens?
I have a wine-induced injury. Not even lying. You know I went to the wine festival on Saturday night and bought several bottles of wine. Well, I purchased a few too many to fit in my handy-dandy wine-carrier that one of the booths gave me, so I was using my purse as a make-shift wine carrier. At one point in the night, I bent over to pick something up and a bottle of wine came rocketing out of my purse and jammed into my elbow. Which luckily broke the fall to the ground, so the wine was salvaged. My elbow was not. I was convinced it was broken for two full days. Joel says broken and "has a bruise" aren't the same. Whatever, it's totally broken. Or chipped. Or something.
I had a cancellation at work on Tuesday, and I actually got to take a nap. It was the best day of my life. Joel was kind enough to recommend I take a nap every day this week, but I told him if I did, we'd have to go to work naked and hungry every day.
I caught up with great friends this week! On Monday, my life-long friend Connie Beth (who just moved back to Owensboro) and my hair expert/very good friend Leslie, and I all went to have drinks and appetizers at a great place called Niko's. It was so much, and I absolutely love getting my friends who don't know each other together, because then we can all be friends! Speaking of, I got to see my very good friend, Brandi and my very good friend/coworker Shelley on Wednesday, and we had lunch at the Bistro with my other very good friend who just moved back to Owensboro, Ashley. I haven't laughed as hard as I did at that lunch in a very long time. In my dream life, I could have lunches like that every day.
I got to see DEE!!! Girls and boys, my sweet preg has been so busy lately because she has welcomed a German exchange student into her home and she has a one year old and our jobs are crazy cakes. But we both had a sliver of time today to grab lunch and tell each other how much we love each other. It made my whole week!! (And I totally think she should start blogging about having a GES, and we should all read it!!! Hint, hint, Dee!!)
We may have a new addition to our family. And when I say "may," I mean most certainly. Remember when Em moved away and my soft-hearted SO agreed to keep her stray kitty at the farm?
Well, I will be completely honest with you for a moment. After she dropped the cat off, we never saw it again. We had resigned ourselves to the fact that it had been eaten by a coyote or something equally as tragic. I poured a bit of wine out for my fallen homie and moved on. But a few nights ago, we saw something stirring in the bushes, and I will be damned if it wasn't that cat. Joel got it food and water, and I convinced myself that I could touch and hold this kitty who hates people. Joel kept telling me this would never happen, but after about 45 minutes, she came into my arms and started calling me her mommy. We held her a bit while Joel made bets with his friends about whether or not I would bring this cat home to live with us. I kept telling him no amount of love justifies a litter box and that this thing could brave the storm at the farm (I mean she already did for almost two months). But within the hour, he had convinced me to bring this thing home. Now we sort of love her. All of us but CD. He's pissed. And she hates him. And they are in constant competition for eating each other's food. So I've played referee all afternoon between these two, but currently we're at peace, so here's hoping. Here's also hoping this sweet kitty learns to use the litter box and that Joel learns to clean it.
Our sweet kitty turned into an attack kitty. So, we were calling the cat Essie. Because originally we named her Shack Cat, but I said I wasn't going to go around calling for "Shack Cat," so we abbreviated to SC. If you say that fast, it's Essie. However, once our sweet little love started coming around and getting super used to her new family, we spotted a flea on her and decided to spray her with a touch of kitty flea spray. Now, her name is Katniss Everdeen because that bitch is a fighter. She scratched us and bit us and otherwise kicked the asses of two humans, despite the fact that she can't weigh more than two pounds. So we have been nursing our wounds today. I am convinced that I have cat scratch fever and that my finger is going to fall off, but both Joel and Grannie Annie keep assuring me that's not the case. Joel's hands look like a tiny vampire tried to eat them from all the fang marks and my finger is hanging half off (no exaggeration. Okay, maybe a little exaggeration.) I'd include pictures but I'm afraid if I keep typing and playing on the computer, the shred of skin that's holding on my middle finger will break and I'll bleed to death. Katniss Everdeen went to the vet today, and she's a healthy little bugger, but we will have to keep an eye on her to make sure she--and we--don't have rabies.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go nurse my wounds and hope that Katniss Everdeen doesn't start foaming at the mouth or go into attack kitty mode again. Wonder what a good dose of wine does to kittens?
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Wednesdays are also for Reflection
Last week, we were on vacation. These are postings in "real-time" And by, "real-time," I mean one week ago today.
It's Wednesday night on vacation and here's what you've missed:
We were getting ready for dinner last night, and I commented on how shitty my hair looks in Florida. I didn't even bother to bring my straightener, but it's so frizzy and gross that it won't even curl properly. So Joel says, "I'll fix it." And proceeded to COMB MY CURLY HAIR. Curly hair girls of the world, you feel my pain. I, trying to be a nice, patient girlfriend, let him comb away, then immediately downed two glasses of wine to help ignore the fact that I had combed curly hair, and I was actually taking that shit out in public. When I saw the final product, I must admit, it didn't look horrible. But I was also half-drunk.
I've also been missing CD so much and saying every morning and every night how we should have snuck him on the plane with us.
We watched a few minutes of what could only be a Mexican Home Makeover show, and we argued about whether what was being shown was the before or after, because there's no way people were crying over some flowered-up wall paper and Wal-Mart comforters, unless they were tears of "oh, shit, what have they done to my home?" But, alas, Joel was right, and it was the 'after' that they were showing. Wowza.
By this morning after the presentation, I was drinking wine straight from the bottle. I mean, it's vacation, and I get to, so why not. Then I went to yoga, and it was every bit of amazing. If that woman taught classes in Owensboro, I would pay whatever it cost to be her student. I felt amazing, stretched out, and super calm when I finished.
Which was good, because some type of f*cking mosquito/bird/bat-type thing bit me all over my arms, and now I have the f*cking West Nile Virus. These are like seriously huge, itchy painful bites, and I am probably dying as I type this. (UPDATE: They are still there. I absolutely have the West Nile Virus.)
Tonight, we had dinner at an amazing restaurant called Big Fin. I had raw oysters, which I love. We shared crab legs, which Joel cracks and peels while I eat, and we split a delicious crab/grouper dish that I barely touched, because it was served with mashed potatoes that I drank with a straw. And because we're on vacation, Joel tested the $21 whisky, and we split a shot of vodka with an oyster in it (not worth $17).
We leave tomorrow morning at the ass crack of dawn, and I'm actually really sad. Not just because this vacation wasn't long enough, but also because I'll miss feeling extravagant and exciting in Orlando, when we go back to our nights of evening news and noodle-less lasagna straight from the casserole dish.
Dose of Perspective: We just talked about it, and although we had a great time here, we agree that we have a pretty incredible life back home. We're so blessed and so surrounded by love in our home that every day feels a little bit like vacation.
And best of all, at home, we have a big furry dog to share it with.
It's Wednesday night on vacation and here's what you've missed:
We were getting ready for dinner last night, and I commented on how shitty my hair looks in Florida. I didn't even bother to bring my straightener, but it's so frizzy and gross that it won't even curl properly. So Joel says, "I'll fix it." And proceeded to COMB MY CURLY HAIR. Curly hair girls of the world, you feel my pain. I, trying to be a nice, patient girlfriend, let him comb away, then immediately downed two glasses of wine to help ignore the fact that I had combed curly hair, and I was actually taking that shit out in public. When I saw the final product, I must admit, it didn't look horrible. But I was also half-drunk.
 |
| I decided I still love him |
Then we had dinner in Downtown Disney, at Fulton's, and by the time we left, we were both covered in lobster juice and butter, but it was oh-so-amazing. And we saw LegoLand, which made me miss my little man and wish he was here with us.
 |
| LEGOS! |
 |
| We argued over whether this was a T Rex. I won. |
I've also been missing CD so much and saying every morning and every night how we should have snuck him on the plane with us.
We watched a few minutes of what could only be a Mexican Home Makeover show, and we argued about whether what was being shown was the before or after, because there's no way people were crying over some flowered-up wall paper and Wal-Mart comforters, unless they were tears of "oh, shit, what have they done to my home?" But, alas, Joel was right, and it was the 'after' that they were showing. Wowza.
By this morning after the presentation, I was drinking wine straight from the bottle. I mean, it's vacation, and I get to, so why not. Then I went to yoga, and it was every bit of amazing. If that woman taught classes in Owensboro, I would pay whatever it cost to be her student. I felt amazing, stretched out, and super calm when I finished.
Which was good, because some type of f*cking mosquito/bird/bat-type thing bit me all over my arms, and now I have the f*cking West Nile Virus. These are like seriously huge, itchy painful bites, and I am probably dying as I type this. (UPDATE: They are still there. I absolutely have the West Nile Virus.)
 |
| West Nile Exhibit A |
 |
| West Nile Exhibit B |
 |
| Making peace with my Florida hair |
Dose of Perspective: We just talked about it, and although we had a great time here, we agree that we have a pretty incredible life back home. We're so blessed and so surrounded by love in our home that every day feels a little bit like vacation.
And best of all, at home, we have a big furry dog to share it with.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Wednesdays are for Just Say No
Last week, we were on vacation. These are postings in "real-time" And by, "real-time," I mean one week ago today.
So apparently it's Wednesday but I can't be bothered with knowing that because I'm on vacation, bitches!! But there are few things in life that don't require work, so of course I had to do a bit of that this morning. Here's the deal:
I cannot say enough good things about our amazing resort/suite. It is beautiful, comfortable, huge, luxurious, friendly, etc etc.
We got it dirt cheap. I didn't really get why, but then we checked in and I noticed a) It's a handicap room. Guess what? That's actually more valuable to me, because I particularly enjoy sitting down while showering and allowing my belly button to look out the peep hole. B) We're across the way from some serious construction. Again, I get the last laugh, because we just turn the TV up louder or the air conditioning up higher so we drown out the sounds of hammering. C) They try to sell you a time share. Not even kidding, they are serious about this shit. They called five times in two days to schedule a complimentary breakfast/meeting with us and give us a welcome gift. I will tell you this: The welcome gift was a travel size shampoo, ten percent off a seafood place we were interested in, and a coupon book to the outlets that probably did legitimately save me quite a bit of money, because I spent my entire savings at the outlet mall.
So Joel tells me since he's doing the conference thing and our time outside of that is precious (damn sweet talker), I should go to the presentation by myself and see what's up. After I cussed at him, I decided this was actually a good idea, because I could claim that I don't make financial decisions without my life partner (we won't tell them about yesterday's shopping decisions made solo) and have an out from their sales pitch. So I get up at an unnecessary hour on vacation and go to the breakfast. I had convinced myself that bacon, eggs, and biscuits would be worth every second until I showed up and realized the breakfast was some damn stale muffins and bad coffee. Already pissed off, I met my sales agent. Honestly, I loved her. She gave me her cell number later in the meeting to call her if Joel and I decided to sign on, and I kind of want to use it to call her just to hang out. She was very low pressure and just gave me the bottom line and how to get the best deal for the money. She understood I couldn't make a decision without Joel and gave me her number to call if we decided to buy. I thought that was it, and I was happy. But then she passed me off to a processor who wasn't as friendly or laid back and acted super pissed off when I said no to a lesser package she was trying to sell me.
As a final kick, they give you a thank you gift forputting up with their shit your time. They let you choose between signing up for their point program and getting the equivalent to one night free hotel stay or $75 cash. They tell you how stupid you'd be to choose the cash, because the hotel stay is much more expensive, and then try to sell you a point package. I assured them that I was, in fact, stupid and wanted my cash. After they act all pissed off and condescending that you've made such a dumb choice, they make you go visit three other people who also try to convince you of your idiocy for taking the money instead of the point program. They all told me it was a bad decision, and I assured them that I make lots of bad decisions and am really quite good at it. I also told them really they were idiots for not realizing I had a firm grasp on my own stupidity and try to flaunt it whenever I can, especially when it comes to monetary matters. But, an hour and a half later, I had a cool $75 in my fist simply for listening to people tell me how dumb I was. Who's dumb now, assholes? I'll think of you while I'm killing even more brain cells with the wine I plan to buy with this moola. In your salesperson faces!
Also, today, I'm linking up with Rachel again for Wonderful Wednesdays! Head on over and check her out!!
So apparently it's Wednesday but I can't be bothered with knowing that because I'm on vacation, bitches!! But there are few things in life that don't require work, so of course I had to do a bit of that this morning. Here's the deal:
I cannot say enough good things about our amazing resort/suite. It is beautiful, comfortable, huge, luxurious, friendly, etc etc.
We got it dirt cheap. I didn't really get why, but then we checked in and I noticed a) It's a handicap room. Guess what? That's actually more valuable to me, because I particularly enjoy sitting down while showering and allowing my belly button to look out the peep hole. B) We're across the way from some serious construction. Again, I get the last laugh, because we just turn the TV up louder or the air conditioning up higher so we drown out the sounds of hammering. C) They try to sell you a time share. Not even kidding, they are serious about this shit. They called five times in two days to schedule a complimentary breakfast/meeting with us and give us a welcome gift. I will tell you this: The welcome gift was a travel size shampoo, ten percent off a seafood place we were interested in, and a coupon book to the outlets that probably did legitimately save me quite a bit of money, because I spent my entire savings at the outlet mall.
So Joel tells me since he's doing the conference thing and our time outside of that is precious (damn sweet talker), I should go to the presentation by myself and see what's up. After I cussed at him, I decided this was actually a good idea, because I could claim that I don't make financial decisions without my life partner (we won't tell them about yesterday's shopping decisions made solo) and have an out from their sales pitch. So I get up at an unnecessary hour on vacation and go to the breakfast. I had convinced myself that bacon, eggs, and biscuits would be worth every second until I showed up and realized the breakfast was some damn stale muffins and bad coffee. Already pissed off, I met my sales agent. Honestly, I loved her. She gave me her cell number later in the meeting to call her if Joel and I decided to sign on, and I kind of want to use it to call her just to hang out. She was very low pressure and just gave me the bottom line and how to get the best deal for the money. She understood I couldn't make a decision without Joel and gave me her number to call if we decided to buy. I thought that was it, and I was happy. But then she passed me off to a processor who wasn't as friendly or laid back and acted super pissed off when I said no to a lesser package she was trying to sell me.
As a final kick, they give you a thank you gift for
Also, today, I'm linking up with Rachel again for Wonderful Wednesdays! Head on over and check her out!!
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Tuesdays are for Shopping
Last week, we were on vacation. These are postings in "real-time" And by, "real-time," I mean one week ago today.
In VacationLand, it's Tuesday, so I'll catch you up on what we've been doing that I haven't already mentioned.
Sunday was our one-year anniversary and after packing frantically, taking CD to the babysitter (aka His Grandpa (aka Joel's Dad) ), and driving to Nashville, we went out for a mini anniversary celebration at our new favorite spot, Bar Louie. We were exhausted, and in fact, ready to go to bed by 6pm, but decided to have a few drinks and enjoy each other's company before heading out for vacation. It was awesome, and we had a great time and took a super cute picture of ourselves on Joel's phone. But he refused to send it to me, because "you're gonna put it on your blog, aren't you." So you get no picture of that night. (Note to self: take that shit with our own phone.)
Monday, our flight was delayed so we decided to commence the celebration with beer and mimosas for breakfast. Everyone at Max and Erma's loved my idea of making mimosas with pineapple juice instead of orange juice, and I don't want to brag, but I'm somewhat famous in the Cincinnati area now.
Because of our mimosa adventure, we got into a bit of a hurry and needed to use the moving walkway. I have never been on one of these, because it's stupid and simply I'm not coordinated enough to handle it. Joel made me suck it up and get on the damn walkway, and it jarred me so much that I may have pulled a muscle in my lower back. I also looked a bit like a drunk toddler on them and people stared.
Then on the plane, I had to go to the bathroom so freaking bad that I started to hum aloud one long, constant note to keep myself from pissing my pants. There was a long, steady stream of people jumping up and going into the bathroom before I could get back there. I find it hardly fair that one frantic-looking lady got to use the facilities 16 times (I counted) during the flight, and I couldn't even go once. Then, when the plane was stopped and everyone was standing in the aisle waiting to get off, Joel encouraged me to "just go now." I got back there, took one look at the toilet, and couldn't pee for the rest of the day. I'm not even kidding. I don't know why my body hates me.
When we got to the car rental place, we got to rent an ELECTRIC CAR!!! Seriously, for dirt cheap. $180 got us a Nissan Leaf for three whole days, and we did not have to pay a cent in gas. It was awesome. I predict we will own an electric car within the year.
We decided to have an early dinner on the resort, since we were both tired from being up since 4am and had buffalo calamari, Shock Top beer (MMMMM), and fajitas for dinner. Our server, Enrique gave us great tips of where to eat for the rest of the trip.
Sometimes on trips, my colon decides to blockade itself so that I can't go to the bathroom the whole time I'm traveling. Sometimes, it panics and releases everything in it. This trip, it was the latter. Our bathroom at home is far from the bed, and we can't hear each other doing our business over the TV and fan. It is wonderful. This was not the case last night, as I was letting out a symphony of lovely sounds, trying to hold it in, making it even worse and louder, while Joel listened outside the door. Even though it's been a year and we've seen all sides of each other, I still can't let him see that side of me. So, when it's all done, I come out sheepishly and say "sowwy, honey." "Huh?" he replies, "I didn't hear anything." What. A. Gentleman.
Later, we were watching TV and came across an old episode of Full House. I confessed to him that growing up I was head over heels in love with Uncle Jessie. He says, "that fat guy on Dukes of Hazard?" Total generational moment.
Today, I got up and commenced with the shopping I have been longing for. Three hours, several bags, one cab ride home, and fist of money later, I have no idea how we're going to get all this shit home.
Here's the breakdown. These were outlet malls, so I purchased:
For Him: 4 button down shirts, 6 t-shirts, polos, or long-sleeve, 1 pr jeans, and 2 Columbia jackets (one winter/one rain).
For Her: 9 shirts, 1 sweater, 1 cardigan, 3 dresses, 1 pr DKNY jeans, and 2 Columbia jackets (one winter/one rain).
What it would have been if not on sale: $1,385.
What is was because I'm an amazing shopper: $640.
It was amazing and although I had to transfer money from savings twice and call BB&T and ask them to please turn my f*cking credit card back on (again), we now have fall wardrobes.
Currently I'm writing at the pool outside our room. Here's a shot of it:
Stay tuned for more vacation fun!
In VacationLand, it's Tuesday, so I'll catch you up on what we've been doing that I haven't already mentioned.
Sunday was our one-year anniversary and after packing frantically, taking CD to the babysitter (aka His Grandpa (aka Joel's Dad) ), and driving to Nashville, we went out for a mini anniversary celebration at our new favorite spot, Bar Louie. We were exhausted, and in fact, ready to go to bed by 6pm, but decided to have a few drinks and enjoy each other's company before heading out for vacation. It was awesome, and we had a great time and took a super cute picture of ourselves on Joel's phone. But he refused to send it to me, because "you're gonna put it on your blog, aren't you." So you get no picture of that night. (Note to self: take that shit with our own phone.)
Monday, our flight was delayed so we decided to commence the celebration with beer and mimosas for breakfast. Everyone at Max and Erma's loved my idea of making mimosas with pineapple juice instead of orange juice, and I don't want to brag, but I'm somewhat famous in the Cincinnati area now.
Because of our mimosa adventure, we got into a bit of a hurry and needed to use the moving walkway. I have never been on one of these, because it's stupid and simply I'm not coordinated enough to handle it. Joel made me suck it up and get on the damn walkway, and it jarred me so much that I may have pulled a muscle in my lower back. I also looked a bit like a drunk toddler on them and people stared.
Then on the plane, I had to go to the bathroom so freaking bad that I started to hum aloud one long, constant note to keep myself from pissing my pants. There was a long, steady stream of people jumping up and going into the bathroom before I could get back there. I find it hardly fair that one frantic-looking lady got to use the facilities 16 times (I counted) during the flight, and I couldn't even go once. Then, when the plane was stopped and everyone was standing in the aisle waiting to get off, Joel encouraged me to "just go now." I got back there, took one look at the toilet, and couldn't pee for the rest of the day. I'm not even kidding. I don't know why my body hates me.
 |
| LOVED this car |
We decided to have an early dinner on the resort, since we were both tired from being up since 4am and had buffalo calamari, Shock Top beer (MMMMM), and fajitas for dinner. Our server, Enrique gave us great tips of where to eat for the rest of the trip.
 |
| See what happens when I take photos on my phone?!? |
Sometimes on trips, my colon decides to blockade itself so that I can't go to the bathroom the whole time I'm traveling. Sometimes, it panics and releases everything in it. This trip, it was the latter. Our bathroom at home is far from the bed, and we can't hear each other doing our business over the TV and fan. It is wonderful. This was not the case last night, as I was letting out a symphony of lovely sounds, trying to hold it in, making it even worse and louder, while Joel listened outside the door. Even though it's been a year and we've seen all sides of each other, I still can't let him see that side of me. So, when it's all done, I come out sheepishly and say "sowwy, honey." "Huh?" he replies, "I didn't hear anything." What. A. Gentleman.
 |
| Dinner at the resort |
 |
| All dressed for dinner |
Later, we were watching TV and came across an old episode of Full House. I confessed to him that growing up I was head over heels in love with Uncle Jessie. He says, "that fat guy on Dukes of Hazard?" Total generational moment.
Today, I got up and commenced with the shopping I have been longing for. Three hours, several bags, one cab ride home, and fist of money later, I have no idea how we're going to get all this shit home.
Here's the breakdown. These were outlet malls, so I purchased:
 |
| The LOOT |
For Her: 9 shirts, 1 sweater, 1 cardigan, 3 dresses, 1 pr DKNY jeans, and 2 Columbia jackets (one winter/one rain).
What it would have been if not on sale: $1,385.
What is was because I'm an amazing shopper: $640.
It was amazing and although I had to transfer money from savings twice and call BB&T and ask them to please turn my f*cking credit card back on (again), we now have fall wardrobes.
Currently I'm writing at the pool outside our room. Here's a shot of it:
 |
| When you're on vacation, you have time to paint all ten! |
Stay tuned for more vacation fun!
Monday, September 17, 2012
Mondays are for Mini Meltdowns, Even on Vacation
Last week, we were on vacation. These are postings in "real-time" And by, "real-time," I mean one week ago today.
This weekend was quite interesting because, as usual, I had booked myself so tight that I could barely stop to glance in the mirror to see how big my stress-induced Mt Vesuvius zit on my forehead had gotten. Saturday was tons of fun because I was able to take my sweet, pint sized man (that's Jaxon. Joel is 6'1, that hardly counts as pint-sized) to a cool festival Owensboro had and throw a mini bday party for him since we'd be missing his party on Sunday.
The day was great, but at the end of it I had a mini meltdown because I always feel so exhausted and pressed for time and can never call people back or return emails or visit people the way I'd like to and despite getting to do fun things, I wasn't able to do the have-to things to prepare for our trip, which meant rushing around Sunday morning and forgetting important things like our unlimited trolley passes for Orlando.
On the car ride home Saturday night, I was confessing to Joel how tired and stressed I am and have been and will be from now until the minute I die an early death because that's what being so stressed all the time does to an otherwise healthy heart, and I just lost my shit. I started crying and talking about childhood traumas and random things like being forced to go to Florida and show off my milky whiteness since I didn't have time to spray tan and having only one toenail painted because that's all I had time for. So when I say mini meltdown, I mean I completely fell the fuck apart.
But for the rest of the night, he was awesomely sweet and attentive and basically waited on me hand and foot. So maybe I should have breakdowns more often. Or maybe if I do, he'll think I'm even more batshit crazy than he already does. Which, surprise Joel, I really am super batshit crazy and will never stop over-extending myself, being in a hurry 100% of the time, and having exhaustion-induced breakdowns (even if it is the day before we leave for a relaxing vacation).
Luckily, now that we're officially on vacation, I can drink alcohol at leisure (like with breakfast) and read and walk slowly and sometimes just sit and think without someone trying to talk to me or schedule me to do something. Sweet, sweet relief.
This weekend was quite interesting because, as usual, I had booked myself so tight that I could barely stop to glance in the mirror to see how big my stress-induced Mt Vesuvius zit on my forehead had gotten. Saturday was tons of fun because I was able to take my sweet, pint sized man (that's Jaxon. Joel is 6'1, that hardly counts as pint-sized) to a cool festival Owensboro had and throw a mini bday party for him since we'd be missing his party on Sunday.
The day was great, but at the end of it I had a mini meltdown because I always feel so exhausted and pressed for time and can never call people back or return emails or visit people the way I'd like to and despite getting to do fun things, I wasn't able to do the have-to things to prepare for our trip, which meant rushing around Sunday morning and forgetting important things like our unlimited trolley passes for Orlando.
On the car ride home Saturday night, I was confessing to Joel how tired and stressed I am and have been and will be from now until the minute I die an early death because that's what being so stressed all the time does to an otherwise healthy heart, and I just lost my shit. I started crying and talking about childhood traumas and random things like being forced to go to Florida and show off my milky whiteness since I didn't have time to spray tan and having only one toenail painted because that's all I had time for. So when I say mini meltdown, I mean I completely fell the fuck apart.
But for the rest of the night, he was awesomely sweet and attentive and basically waited on me hand and foot. So maybe I should have breakdowns more often. Or maybe if I do, he'll think I'm even more batshit crazy than he already does. Which, surprise Joel, I really am super batshit crazy and will never stop over-extending myself, being in a hurry 100% of the time, and having exhaustion-induced breakdowns (even if it is the day before we leave for a relaxing vacation).
Luckily, now that we're officially on vacation, I can drink alcohol at leisure (like with breakfast) and read and walk slowly and sometimes just sit and think without someone trying to talk to me or schedule me to do something. Sweet, sweet relief.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)