Monday, September 10, 2012

Five Random Opinions (Rachel's Linky Party Fun)

I recently posted an opinion post (that now has everyone I know scared to speak to me for fear of critique--let me help out, I am critiquing you, but only judging if I don't love you), but today Rachel over at LalaLists is having a linky party that's opinion-themed. (Autocorrect really wanted to change that to kinky party, which would have changed this post altogether, and I'm not sure Rachel wants me telling the world about her having those kind of parties!) So, because you can't get enough, here are five random opinions.


Crocs are stupid. You will never, ever find crocs on my feet unless in the case of my untimely death, someone puts them on me in my casket to get back at me for something I did like correcting their grammar and chiding them for bad fashion choices. In which case, I will come back as an actual crocodile and bite that person's feet off. Laugh last? All mine.

You should respect the president whether you agree with him or not. I once had a teacher I hated and she hated me back. I wore lip gloss to her class and she made me wash it off. From that day forward, I chose to believe she hated me because I was prettier than her. Even though I hated her, I respected her. She was my teacher, and it was only right of me to not undermine her authority, defy her, or defame her. And the same goes with the leader of our country. The things I have heard people say lately make me cringe. At the end of the day, he deserves respect. His job is much harder than yours even on its worst day. And a little more love and respect in any situation can't hurt. So give it up.

When people say amaze balls, totes, or woot, I want to poke them in the eye. It makes me scream. It's like fingernails on a chalk board to me. These are made-up words that should have never been made up. Totes is the least offensive, but you sound like a modern day, albeit stupider version of Bill, Ted, Wayne or Garth. As if 'totally' doesn't make you sound stupid enough, you're not even smart enough to finish the word. And who decided woot is a celebratory word? It is typically the word that comes out of my mouth when I slip on water and catch myself before anyone important sees. Or the word that pops out on the occasion that I realize there was a little more substance to a fart than originally thought. Not a word used to tell someone I'm excited about something. So shut the woot up. The worst one is amaze balls. I have yet to see a pair of these that count as amazing, much less that are so awe-inspiring that I want to turn it into a positive adjective. Why did we add balls to an otherwise good word?? Wise up, people of the world, and stop making yourself look stupider using these dumb words.

Bare minerals is maybe the best thing I've ever put on my face (besides a kiss from my sweet SO, that is). I'll admit, I was resistant to it at first. I kept thinking my face looks far too shitty to get all the coverage I need out of a powder. I need coverage the consistency of paint and primer duo. But my good friend, Shelley began singing the praises of BareMinerals and my face did it's once a year freak-out around the same time. Covered in zits, red splotches, and dry patches, I decided I needed a miracle. And Bare Minerals was it. From the moment I began using my THREE kits I purchased, I have been a believer. The coverage is amazing, it makes me look bright and not old, and feels like I have nothing on my face. I'm in love, and it feels so good.

Of all the things that piss me off, LOL might be the biggest one. Let me let you in on a little secret: haha (an actual laugh/onamonapia) is a mere one letter longer! And rarely does something make me, in fact, laugh out loud. At which point, I'm so appreciative of the chuckle that I say 'I laughed out loud.' I have deleted phone numbers of potential suitors for the use of LOL. And my close friends know how I hate it, although I will forgive an occasional slip if I love you. (or in Joel's case, I will respond, 'That was funny, but don't use LOL.' I can't explain the fury it ignites in me, but it's there. And it's easy to alleviate. With a simple 'haha.'

There you have it. Five opinions that your day wouldn't be complete without. Dear World, you are welcome.